First of all, I suppose congratulations are in order.
You are one hell of a salesman, good sir, and anyone who would dare claim otherwise is a liar.
Your approach to this electoral campaign is textbook branding. Every single commercial and television appearance of yours promotes only one message repeatedly:
I was poor, hence I understand the poor.
Never mind that you now have more than 15 subdivisions and a freaking highway.
Never mind that you haven’t been to Moriones in years, except perhaps to shoot one of those scenes in your commercial.
Never mind that you have not offered anything substantial in your years as senator and congressman.
Never mind that you have a constant influx of botox injections, rendering your eyes nigh impossible to keep open.
The fact that you were ONCE poor should be enough for all of us to root for you.
Just one thing, sir, if I may.
Here’s my teensy-weensy little message, from the bottom of my heart to yours:
STOP PANDERING TO THE POOR YOU FUCKING IDIOT.
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